one year tenley.

some would say it was the best year of their life or the fastest or even the hardest and i'm sure i've said my fair share of whatevers, but as of now i'd say the past year has been, well, all of it. there is no one word or emotion to describe our first year as a family of four, as is the same can be said of our tenley girl.

before i met you i thought i knew it all, you know, baby number 2, i got this stuff. i had the perfect rock and sway, scheduling was already planned out in my head, daddy the perfect swaddle etc. etc. and BAM!

YOU!

what in the world was i thinking?!

i've wondered to myself before about how far our struggle goes back and i think it's safe to say "in the womb" as we thought we'd lost you once around 11 weeks.

from day one when i saw your tiny balled up little fists i knew you were going to be a fighter! but i think you've proven to be a lover as well and you've set your sights on your big brother. you adore him and when he's in the room no one else matters. it's ridiculous really, but it just might be the cutest thing on the planet. you are one passionate and determined little soul. you do everything with all your might. you play hard, laugh hard, fight hard, cry hard, and love hard. you fight with all you have and love with even more.

you have always been the unpredictable in my predictable controlled world. the humbling reminder to my "know-it-all" ways. the feisty fire-ball that knows precisely what she wants and five minutes ago! however tough it has been trying to figure out how to be the best mommy to my sweet and complicated tenley girl, you have always been exactly what i needed right when i needed it. you have shown me things about myself that i never knew were there. you've drawn out my weaknesses and caused me to lean on my Savior even more. you've grown me and stretched me in more ways than any one person ever has and for that i am forever grateful. you've been God's sanctifying tool in my life that's for sure.

i'm blessed to be your mommy and am thankful for the struggle that we've had getting to know one another this past year. it has made getting things just right that much more sweet.

this past year with you has been trying and fun, happy and sad, up and down, high and low, full of laughter and tears, anything and everything, yep, all of it. in the very best possible way.

here's to many more years growing together as a mother and a daughter.

love you forever baby,

momma

11 months.

i left you for 10 days this month and it was ridiculously hard to be away from you for that long. like ridiculous. plus it's crazy how quickly you change at this age. when i got home you looked different. you were cruising around the furniture and you had finally perfected the clap that we'd been working on.

you still aren't a big talker, but that's fine with me. i can just sit and enjoy the silence with you for now if that's what you like, every good introvert likes a little solitude as you know. we went to the doctor for your one month check up on the tubes in your ears and everything looks great. so that's good news!

lately you've just been gobbling up the blueberries just like your brother. my little blueberry babies! you still have 4 teeth on top and 2 on bottom. and you're still a biter. bit the crud out of your brother today...but hey, you're a great eater though if that makes up for it, i'm not sure?

one of my favorite things is holding you when you let me rest your head on my shoulder. i really wish you'd cuddle more, but i can't get enough of these little fleeting moments.

can't believe you've been in our lives for almost a year now. time does fly.

love you forever,

momma